I’m Still Standing

While the memories are distinct and clear, it was all such a blur and in an instant, my life had changed…

The phone rang and someone in the house had answered, it was the neuro-ophthalmologist and he asked us to come in immediately. When we arrived, he wasted no time and pulled no punches.

“Chris, your MRI showed a very large mass in the center of your brain. I’ve already contacted the chief of neurosurgery at Yale NH and he and his team are waiting for you.”

Today marks fifteen years since that fateful day and I have learned so much – about myself, but also about perseverance and realizing that not much else truly matters except for family, health and happiness. I will surely celebrate and enjoy the day, but I’d be remiss if I did not take this time to reflect and express my gratitude for life and all of you.

For far too long, I had taken life for granted. I set lofty goals for myself and was determined to achieve them, but you know the story, life had different plans for me. And all these years later, I now realize and can proudly say that this has been for the better and is oddly the best thing that could have happened to me.

I found my purpose in life and am grateful to wake up every day and help patients and families undergoing a brain tumor diagnosis. Although I am not a neurosurgeon or a neuro-oncologist, I get to take my experience and share that with patients and families in need of support and guidance. I suppose it is therapeutic, but I also think I enjoy getting to use my law degree in a non-traditional way of problem solving and getting good results, be it treatment or financial support. None of this was on my radar in 2008 as I was wheeled into the OR, but life led me to this point.

Through it all, the surgeries, gamma knife, countless MRIs and the feeling of hopelessness and despair, I’ve been blessed to have the greatest support system in my family and friends…I’m incredibly lucky. I still keep in touch with my neurosurgeon, who’s become a great friend to me, as well as the many nurses who cared for me. Again, had you told me this is what would happen back in 2008, I would’ve said you’re crazy. In my office, I have a box of all my stuff from 2008 – the flash cards, ABC board, homework from rehab, my progress reports, etc. Each July 2nd, I open that box and I flip through it all, and while I still laugh at most of homework assignments, reading the progress reports, especially the neuropsychologist’s reports still jars me.

Yet, here I am, stronger than ever.

So today, fifteen years since that dreadful day, I’m still standing and I believe that my best days are yet to come. I don’t have a crystal ball to know what life has in store for me next, but I know that because of this journey and all of the remarkable people who have played a part, “I got this,” just as I said to my family that ominous morning fifteen years ago.

One thought on “I’m Still Standing”

  1. Beautifully written Christopher. You should be very proud of yourself… I am! You have touched the lives of so many. I love you.❤️❤️

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